Meena's Musings

What we judge, we don’t forgive


How is judgement and forgiveness tied together?
That which we judge to be wrong, bad, inferior in others, we hold it against them and don’t forgive them for it. (In the last blog, I talked about how forgiveness is not our task.) All judgment is Self-judgment; that which we judge in others we have somewhere judged ourselves for the same thing. It shows up externally so we may look within and actually forgive ourselves.  This is the process of becoming whole; bringing all parts of ourselves that we had pushed away. We become what we judge in others and what we don’t forgive in others.
Our current politics have brought so much judgment to the surface. It does not matter how legit our explanations or reasoning may be, what matters is what we continue to create in ourselves by judging it. There is an Obama and Trump in all of us. Yes, I know I am taking a huge risk by making this statement but that’s how I see it. We all have polarities within us that we must recognize.
When we wrong someone else, we wrong that part in ourselves. When we wrong that part in ourselves, we wrong others. We get caught in this vicious cycle of hatred and pain which serves no one.
When we judge others, we gossip about them, that’s how we process the judgment; we want to make ‘them” wrong and make ourselves right. Gossip is that which we don’t have the guts to say directly to the person; even if we are listening to someone else gossip we become part of the equation. When we participate in gossip, we are judging because we are listening and validating the other person’s view or judgment.
When we gossip, we take on their Karma i.e. the reaction of that energy boomerangs back to us. And the person we are talking about, takes our karma. Ever wonder why people who do so many “bad” things continue to prosper in their lives, because they have so many “fans” talking bad about them, taking their Karma.  And remember, the physical manifestation of engaging in these feelings isn’t far.
Let’s start with our own family. Do you talk about one member to the other? The truth is we all do. The other truth is it also keeps us swirling in this circle of gossip and sucks our energy. We create triangular relationships which don’t work. When we have issue with one member of our family, that’s the only person we need to have a conversation with.
We all live in glass houses; the stones we throw on others can also break our own homes. We are all in this life together. We are all human. We all face the same challenges hidden in different lifestyles and stories. It does not mean we have to agree with others, like them or be a part of what they are doing but we don’t need to make them wrong or judge them.
Remember, “When we don’t see God in all, We don’t see God at all”  It’s all GOD having different experiences of human life. Every human on this planet is looking to be happy, to be seen and held and they have the right to pick their path of achieving that. We don’t need to agree with anything, but we do need not to make it wrong either.
We are in this together.  We are here to love and walk each other home.  This is the ultimate purpose of our human existence.  At least, that’s what I think.  I am grateful to be a tiny part in your path.