Emotional Healing has become a necessity as we shift into Higher Consciousness. Drawn towards a brighter and healthier future, all that we haven’t healed continues to pull us back and becomes our biggest obstacle in living our dreams.
To heal our emotions, let’s first understand what emotions are. Emotions are energy in motion; the non-physical and the most fundamental part of our experiences. We have been conditioned to undermine our emotions and suppress them to maintain status quo and rely heavily on our intellect and logic to manage them. We talk ourselves out of feeling what we feel, until we experience the intensity and the urgency of what we feel and explode. This does not help anyone. When we push our emotions away, we push them deeply in our subconscious; left unattended for a long period of time they become complex and can result in physical ailments. Time after time, in my practice, I have yet to find a client whose physical symptoms or diagnosis are not related to their emotional health.
Disturbed emotions disturb the energy of our body, weaken immunity and diminish our vitality. They are not some fluffy impulses to be ignored, rather they are our inner signals that act as a compass and provide a direction for our life. Unhealed emotions are diseases in the making, adding a psychological weight that we don’t even know we are carrying and sets the stage for our adult experiences. The physical simply mirrors the non-physical.
We pass on to the next generation everything we don’t’ heal. We attract the partner, the boss, the friend or the life situation and relive those experiences until we interrupt the cycle and start the process of emotional healing.
“Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways” – Sigmund Freud
How Do We Heal?
What’s the healing? How do we heal?
In my book, “Wake up and Heal – 6 Steps to Emotional Freedom”, I share a very powerful technique for emotional healing. I was fortunate to be led to the teachings and this technique at a time in my life where I had exhausted all I knew and was desperately seeking answers. This technique worked in ways I could have never imagined and it has worked for hundreds of my clients.
There are 2 fundamental shifts that can ease the process of emotional healing. First, energy can neither be destroyed nor created, it can only be transmuted. We bring energy from prior lifetimes to heal; the experiences merely repeat so we can heal those energies. Second, nothing happens without our soul’s permission. We have chosen all of our experiences at the soul level. The question to ask is, why would I choose these experiences?
The greatest challenge to emotional healing I see in my clients is fear; fear of being overwhelmed at what shows up and fear of having to relive the pain. I want to assure you that The Greater Intelligence always has our back; we are equipped with built-in defense mechanism which ensures that whatever arises does because we are able to handle it.
6 Step Process for Emotional Healing
I walk my clients through this process as a meditation with a focus on their heart so they go straight into the experience of healing. You can first read through the process to understand it and repeat it with a focus on your heart to experience it.
How will you know this process is working? Self-sabotage begins to transform into self-care, judgment transforms into acceptance, shame, blame and guilt are no longer part of your vocabulary and you experience more moments of joy in your life. Once the process begins, there is no stopping it. Small changes are not so small. We heal when we are no longer experience the charge of the emotion.
1st Step: Awareness
Pick any area of your life and tune into what’s showing up. You will notice that when you pick one area of your life, the same experiences may become apparent in other areas of your life as well. Our emotions are interconnected and can’t be compartmentalized. When we pick one, we pick everything. Here are a few methods that are effective in increasing your awareness.
Journaling what you feel is a great way to see your inner world on paper. Create a quiet and safe space and time to do this for 10 days. After 10 days, go back and read what you have written. You may see a pattern or a theme.
Awakening our 5 senses is another great way. The five senses are Seeing, Hearing, Tasting, Touching, Smelling. Our senses store information and over time, can also become either dull or sharp as a response to what we have endured. Notice which one of your senses is dull and which ones are sharp. You can do these simple exercises in your mind or actively to awaken your senses: smell the flowers, touch the wet nose of a horse, feel the soft fur of a kitten, touch the rough bark of the tree, put your bare hands in a bowl of potato chips, crunch them and lick the salty fingers.
Do a 5-minute breathing meditation. Here, all of your senses will merge into the knowing sense. What do you already know in your gut? Are you becoming aware of a pattern in your life?
Healing is an ever-deepening process of becoming the truer version of ourselves. In asking the bigger questions; what am I feeling? why? where have I felt this before? What am I being asked to see? is how we get closer to our Truth.
How we react to each step is individual. Notice the mental interference in what you are becoming aware of.
2nd Step: Acknowledgment
This step is about validating what you have become aware of. It can feel like a breath of fresh air that takes away the need to suppress your feelings or the fear of expressing them.
Not acknowledging is like turning a blind eye, pretending you don’t know what you know. This creates inner conflict, confusion and psychological complexities.
Awareness brings forth the need to change and we have to be ready to change. The risk of shattering the status quo and our sense of familiarity can be too big at times. Resistance will show up at every step, it is a sign that the process is underway and is working. Notice it and don’t force. Simply become aware of this resistance. Remember, we are always straddling both sides of this process: acknowledging and resisting.
3rd Step: Acceptance
This is a big step. The path to acceptance is riddled with pain, fear, anger, shame, blame, guilt, avoidance and everything in between. Some of us can remain here for decades.
Acceptance is not complacency, agreeing, liking or condoning. Acceptance is about taking responsibility for our own experiences. It’s not about accepting others; it’s about accepting all the painful parts of ourselves that we may have denied or abandoned.
Acceptance is about opening your heart to all the parts of yourself, of becoming whole. When we open our heart, we soften, we begin to embrace our own darkness, we begin to love the “unlovable” part of ourselves. This is how we expand into our Wholeness.
Our heart is like the ocean; the ocean accepts all, it has only One Flow of Love. Our Heart only knows Love. Learning to open our heart, so the love can flow into all the areas of our life which are fear ridden.
We feel the pain that we did not allow ourselves to feel before. Feel the pain now so you don’t have to feel it for the rest of your life.
4th Step: Appreciation
Every challenge can be a blessing if we are willing to see it as such. Going through the challenge is how we can carve out all that is not us to make visible what’s truly us.
Appreciation is different from being grateful; rather it is about seeing the silver lining in the clouds and trusting it is there even if you don’t’ see it. The question to ask is. “Who am I because of this challenge instead of how much pain did the challenge bring about?”
It will serve us to insist on seeing the silver lining, otherwise, we will miss the point and the learning. It’s not pretentions or spiritual and just being grateful, it’s about developing a higher perspective to see the gifts in our challenges.
5th Step: Application
This is the step where transformation takes place. We shift from simply having the knowledge to living the knowledge. This is wisdom.
Here we have an opportunity to train our mind to follow the heart and become it’s master.
The ego mind will pull us into the familiar and comfortable way of being and reacting. Our mental addictions will show up here. We get addicted to certain emotions and arouse them again and again by reliving the pain in our own minds.
From the higher perspective, this happens so we can heal it each time but since we don’t know that we can simply become addicted to our own intense emotional charges that make us feel alive but keep us stuck in the pattern of suffering.
This is exactly where we need to clue in: that we know more, we now know a different way, and this is where we drop into the heart and go through the above 4 steps. Be patient, kind and gentle and before you know it, this would become your new habit.
In the process, you’ll get to experience both ways of being and your Higher Self will choose the one that feels better and feels like home. Recognize resistance that may show up in the form of logic, explanations and intellect. This is where your work is.
Emotional healing is the process of applying the above 4 steps and these steps take place in our heart. This is how we become anchored in Love and become free.
6th Step: Anchoring in Love
We like the idea of love but are far from understanding it. Love is all fine until we have to love our own fears and love someone we can’t stand. That is where our work is.
Without a direct experience of love, we make up all kinds of notions about it and at the very best, it is a mere fantasy that we chase outside of ourselves.
We are conditioned to think that love is everything nice and positive which implies that everything negative and dark we experience is not love.
In this emotional healing process, we expand the definition of Love to include all the negative emotions, the darkness in the One flow of love. No experiences are kicked out. This is where we become free. Fear transforms into Love; Self- hatred turns to self- care, judgment into acceptance, shame into vulnerability, guilt into self-love, lack into abundance, and worry and anxiety into trust. Just like the ocean, the Heart only has ONE FLOW OF LOVE; in our hearts, LOVE is whole and not fragmented; In the eyes of the heart, there is nothing that is not love
Heart and Love are synonymous; Love is a state of being, it’s a constant, not dependent upon someone’s views, opinions, actions or behavior. Here we free the energy of pain and suffering in its highest expression, which is Love.
You can also listen to my podcast on emotional healing, recorded on the day of the July New Moon and you will hear about my experience of the energy that day. Episode #70 Why We Must Heal Our Emotions
Hope you found something here that stirred you to move towards emotional healing. If you are ready to dive deeper, I invite you to check out my membership program called the Inner Compass Club. https://www.innercompassclub.com If you rather work individully, you can schedule an Initial Consultation Here